Aren’t sayings funny? The “honest truth.” There is no other truth, but the honest kind. There is no honesty without truth.
I’ve figured out why it annoys me (and only slightly) when people ask me how the job hunt is going.
1) I think that obviously, if it were going well, they wouldn’t have a reason to ask how it is going.
2) It’s kind of like when you’re pregnant and the first thing people ask, or the only thing people ever talk to you about is your pregnancy. Or if you are crying and people keep asking you if you are okay.
The other day someone asked how it was going, and for the whole of this month I have felt great about it (until today). I wasn’t annoyed by this person’s asking. Especially, since they really had no clue. It was when they ended the conversation with, “Oh, well keep trying, don’t give up. There’s something out there for you. ” I wanted to say, “Would you shut up!”
I think most people might describe how I feel about it as discouraged or hopeless. I prefer to say that I am in the cynical stage, maybe even the pessimistic stage. The sarcastic naysayer. And let me tell you, I am not naturally a pessimist, and I have never been more cynical than when I was in graduate school. I tend to border on idealism with a healthy does of re-al-i-ty. Pessimists annoy me.
And when you are at the point where you are annoying yourself, everyone else is bound to annoy you, too. Innocent bystanders, you are. But seriously, there is more to my life than my job situation. A lot more. It isn’t even the biggest thing going on right now. Definitely not the only thing. It isn’t even a fun topic. So why the heck do people keep asking? It’s not that people keep asking that annoys me, it’s when it is the only thing they ask about. My disclaimer is that sometimes I even start off the conversation (aren’t you proud of me) or try to turn the attention to the other person.
Here are some other things people could say to me instead of asking “How is the job hunt going?”:
— Can I invite you and your family over for dinner?
— Would you mind if I added some money to your bank account?
— What is your favorite color?
— What has God been showing you lately?
— What is the most enjoyable thing you’ve done this month?
— You look a little thin, here have a Twinkie.
— Oh, are you trying to grow out your mustache?
— Why are you so crabby?
Any of those will do.
I will only be so rude as to make this “stop asking” announcement on my blog. I am as polite as I can be when people ask. And most people don’t ask anymore. I think most people know that as long as I have been looking, they will know if something changes. I even go as far as to give updates on interviews and what not when people don’t ask cause I know people want to know and most are being polite in not asking. Some people even ask in a way that they are holding me accountable. That does not annoy me…as much. Some people are genuinely interested. Good for them. Others are just making chit chat. That’s the worst. I do not go as far as to determine their motives. They all annoy me.
It’s not you, it’s me.