There are so many things I remain silent about. It isn’t that I do not hold an opinion, it’s that I’m very selective about what I choose to vocalize. Most often I’ve also found that conversations about political matters (though I typically have something to say) are the last thing I want to waste my breath on, especially around a bunch of people who have all the right answers and are so closed-minded they would rather insult your opinions than listen and learn something. I assume that some of my characteristics (black, woman, Christian, Pastor’s wife) leads some people to assume I believe certain things. There are a few things that have been on my mind lately, that I thought I would share a small portion of my thoughts here. I hope one day to write in more detail about each of them.


I think abortion is wrong. It is murder, so I think it should be treated as such. However, before I ever protest abortion I would find a way to show those women love and acceptance cause them knowing that they are loved and accepted is much more important to me than making a point. I think more about the individuals and their hurt than I think about the act they are doing/have done/ etc. Stopping abortion starts with loving the people. I think the hand-painted pro life signs are creepy. Everything surrounding abortion is heartbreaking. If I had to put myself in a box, it would be pro-life.


I have spent considerable thought into seeking out homosexuals so they can know that there is at least one person who claims to be a Christian will love them and accept them. It’s a group of people I have a heart for. I think the way that most Christians respond to homosexuals is just another reason many people will not come to Christ. Homosexuals identify with homosexuality as “who they are” just as most ethnic groups identify with their ethnicity being “who they are” , therefore Christians need a different method.

Christians and Dating

I think that relationships for relationships sake is overrated. I don’t think you need to practice getting emotionally involved with a person to prepare you for marriage, and you’re just setting yourself up. I think it is good and okay to give someone a shot. If you are interested in someone–not just hormonally (in that case, run the other way–really)–sure, go out to eat or whatever. I think if Christian guys stop being cowards, the women wouldn’t have to start feeling like they have to go out and get a man. There is beauty in pursuit and no woman should be deprived of that. Stop watching so many romantic comedies, they aren’t helping you.


Conversations about politics are a sure way to bore me to tears. I think those types of conversations are fun zappers. However, I do have opinions. I assume that most people are quite confused by my political views. Stereotypically my blackness would dictate that I am a democrat and my Chritianess would dictate that I am a Republican. If you’ve really been dying to know, I’m neither. I think I took a test once that said I was a communist. Nathan has called me that before. Whatever. I don’t identify as anything and will vote for the best person for the job and will support whoever is in office, because they are who’s in office whether I agree with everything they stand for or not. I think Christians need to be involved and need to know what’s going on and not just vote for someone cause they have one political view that you agree with.

My walk with Jesus

I’ve decided I will stop trying to be like Jesus. Why do we say that anyway? There is no way that me trying to be like a perfect human is going to help me to be who God created me to be. Jesus is in me and I don’t think I can be any more like him than that. So as I become who he wants me to be the Jesus in me will be more evident. Does that make sense? To me, trying to be like Jesus is works based and legalism is sure to take hold. Trying to be like Jesus is trying to be perfect and I don’t think God wants us to try to be perfect, he just wants us to be His. So last week I said, “I’m going to stop trying to be like Jesus, and just be who God created me to be.” Overall I think my relationship with the Lord sucks, but he loves me anyway.

New moms/parenting

New moms are funny. We never stop being a new mom in the sense that we tend to have that “no one can tell me how to raise my child” attitude. Therefore, I don’t give parenting advice–unless asked. If you want to tick me off instantly, insult my parenting or my kids or ignore my requests for my kids. Catch the “my kids” part? Nathan and I are more than open to taking advice/criticism from people who present it well, but insults and accusations just will not do. I’ve been thinking a lot about this one lately. The thing about parenting advice is that every parent is different, every kid is different, and you don’t know what is going on at home. There is no way we can have a full picture of what is going on so the advice that we may have from our experience may do nothing for the next person. I have parenting tips and wisdom that I think is helpful for general child rearing, but unless a parent asks I could be asking for a bear attack. I once got very nervous telling a mom her car seat was installed improperly cause I knew the risk of that situation could have been that she thought I was saying she was a bad parent. I was willing to risk it, cause her child’s safety was in danger.

Female Friends

I know I’d be a knock out girl friend if any one ever had the energy to give me a try, or if I had the energy. I think it is very sad that some single women think that once a woman gets married she doesn’t need girl friends, so they stop including her. I can’t say that’s happened to me, but I’ve seen it happen. I think it’s sad that some people have to put friendship on a list of things to do, and it is usually at the bottom. I think it’s sad that some people think they don’t need friends. I think friendship is important. I think it’s sad that I’m finding my way into giving up on a close friendship with a woman.

So that’s what I really think. Wanna know what I really think about anything else, just ask? Although I don’t volunteer much information I’ll answer anything and a well asked question goes a long way.